The Girl in the Red Shoes

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The Breastfeeding Diaries: Megan’s Story

Hi! My name is Megan and I’m a full time working Mommy to Olivia (2 ½ years old) and Nolan (8 months old). I stumbled across Julie’s blog while perusing Pinterest (I’m addicted!) and have been following ever since. I am grateful to her for starting this series and for everyone that has shared their story. It’s reassuring to know that you aren’t the only one experiencing the ups and downs of breastfeeding.

Olivia
When I was pregnant with my daughter, I didn’t really give breastfeeding much thought. I had planned on breastfeeding and naively thought that it would come easily – it’s what Mom’s are made to do, right? Well, when my water broke during birthing class at 35 weeks I quickly learned that I was very wrong. Despite being early, Olivia was healthy but had trouble regulating her sugars. She was given formula right away to help remedy this and I started pumping to encourage my milk to come in. The lactation consultant showed me how to use the hospital grade pump and that’s basically where our relationship ended. I wasn’t encouraged to nurse Olivia, I don’t even think she attempted to show me how to latch her or position her. I was so overwhelmed and exhausted that I didn’t think to ask questions or request another visit from the lactation consultant. We simply fed Olivia the formula provided and I pumped every 3 hours.

 This routine continued once we came home from the hospital. I would pump around the clock only to get around 2 ounces of milk total. I would occasionally try to nurse Olivia but she would get so frustrated at how hard she had to work for such a small amount of milk that our nursing sessions often ended with her screaming and me crying. But, I kept pumping. And I kept getting 2 ounces of milk. 24 hours of pumping and only 2 ounces of milk to show for my efforts?! I was beyond frustrated! I mentioned my frustration at my 6 week postpartum checkup and my Doctor decided to test my prolactin levels. Turns out, I wasn’t producing enough prolactin to stimulate milk production. I had a choice to make at this point. I could continue pumping but would probably never get more than 1 to 2 ounces a day OR I could stop pumping all together. At 8 weeks, I put the pump away for good and let me tell you, I was SO much happier! I wasn’t angry or upset about only getting a few drops after being hooked to the pump for 20 minutes. I was able to enjoy every minute with my daughter without the nagging feeling that I was going to have to pump again in just 2 short hours. It was as if a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders and I spent the rest of my maternity leave snuggling my little peanut with a smile on my face!
 Nolan
Nolan is a whole different story! I was determined to breastfeed with him. And if I wasn’t able to breastfeed, I was determined to exclusively pump. Bottom line, I was determined to make more than 2 ounces of milk! This time around I knew the importance of getting help and guidance from the lactation consultant while in the hospital and I planned to take full advantage of having them there. I also talked about breastfeeding a lot with my friends who had been successful at it and I felt like I had gathered some good tips and information.

Not to be out done by his big sister, Nolan was born at 36 weeks. I started nursing him within the hour following his birth. He latched very well and it seemed that our first attempt was successful. Once we were settled in our postpartum room, I began nursing Nolan every 3 hours and I also began pumping to encourage my milk to come in. Although it was taking him around an hour to nurse, things seemed to be going well. And then we came home from the hospital….I no longer had an experienced RN at my beck and call to double check our latch and help me position the baby. My nipples got extremely sore and chapped and it was taking Nolan FOREVER to finish eating. Sometimes it would take close to 2 hours to complete a nursing session. And by the time I finished pumping afterwards, it was time to start all over again. I was exhausted and frustrated.
Right away I decided to make an appointment with the lactation consultant that had an office within my OB’s office. This was the best decision I made! She was so caring and compassionate and really took her time to help us. I also learned a great deal about why it was taking Nolan so long to nurse. He was born 4 weeks early and had jaundice. He was still developing and jaundice can create lazy eaters because their energy is being spent getting rid of the excessive bilirubin. After our visit I started nursing Nolan for 15 to 20 minutes on each side. I would then pump. If he still acted hungry, I would offer the pumped milk. Not only did this save me time but it also gave my nipples a chance to heal. As Nolan got stronger and continued to develop, it was no longer necessary to supplement with a bottle and I was eventually able to stop pumping after every feeding.
 Here we are, 8 months later, and we are still going strong. He gets a bottle at daycare but he is exclusively breastfed when we are together. I pump 3 times at work and am able to get enough milk for the next day. He is loving all the new foods we are introducing and I can’t wait until he masters picking up little pieces of fruits and veggies and is able to feed himself. There were several times in the beginning when I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to stick with breastfeeding. It’s a big commitment and it falls on your shoulders. But we have such a great rhythm now and I am so thankful that I am able to provide this healthy gift to my son. Every time he looks up at me with that milky smile it reminds me why I chose to do this.
Advice
My advice to new breastfeeding Mommies is this – be patient, give yourself a break. You are learning just as much as your baby is learning and it takes some time to get to know one another. Take it day by day. There will be rough days and it’s ok if you don’t love every second of it. I promise, as your baby grows and you become more familiar with one another you will develop a rhythm. It does get better, it does get easier. Cherish these special moments because the time goes so quickly! I hope that my experience offers encouragement to those that may have been unsuccessful at breastfeeding the first time around. Thank you again to Julie for allowing me to share my story. And thank you to all the Mommies that have shared their personal stories. I really do believe we can learn so much from one another. Happy World Breastfeeding Week!
If you would like to share your breastfeeding story please email me! Be sure to catch up with the rest of the Breastfeeding Diaries series at the top of my navigation bar. 



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Comments

  1. Megan, thank you for sharing!! This was so encouraging to me. I had issues breastfeeding my son who was born early and am so scared I will have the same issues with my next baby. Your success story made me feel so much better. (And the pics of your little ones are so cute!) Thanks again for sharing! -Holly

  2. Thank you for giving me hope that with number two my body might cooperate! I had seriously almost given up hope that I'd ever be able to exclusively nurse (or make more than an ounce of milk every 6 hours).

  4. Thanks for sharing both your stories! There is so much pressure to breastfeed and that it's "nautral" that we often have false expectations. The reality is it's hard work and doesn't always work and that side needs to be told more often so women ask for the help they need! Your kiddos are beautiful thanks for sharing!

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The Breastfeeding Diaries: Megan from Mackey Madness

Oh breastfeeding, where do I even begin…haha. First off, I’m Megan from Mackey Madness and I have a 5 month old precious little girl named Emory. We are still exclusively breastfeeding and I feel super blessed that we have been able to continue for this long. My goal has always been 6 months and it’s nice to see it getting closer and closer. That being said however, make no mistake, we did not have an easy road and in the beginning I didn’t think we were going to make it. But we did…and I am so glad. 
My first few days of breastfeeding in the hospital were great. Emory latched on right away and we did fine every single feeding. I was thinking that I was one of the lucky ones. Once we got home, though, things took a turn for the worse during the second week…my nipples started hurting SO bad. I’m talking worse than contractions, I promise. Or at least it felt like that at the time. I began to dread every single feeding and I would start crying when I knew it was time to feed her. The latching on was the worst and the pain got better as she nursed, but it was still so painful. I tried a lot of things to get relief and nothing really helped. On top of the pain, I felt like the worst mom because I was dreading her feedings. And trust me, when your hormones are crazy postpartum, the last thing you need is something making you feel even worse! 
It took about 3-4 weeks for the pain to completely disappear, but it did get a little bit better each week. I reached out to friends who had breastfed or were currently breastfeeding for support and encouragement. That was the biggest key to us making it through the pain – the encouragement. I knew that if I could just keep hanging in there, the pain would go away. I took it one feeding at a time…I would think, “if we can just make it through this feeding, we are doing good.” I spent a lot of time praying while she nursed, too, which definitely helped to take my mind off of the pain. 
Now here we are, 5 months later and doing good. I don’t want to scare anyone with writing all of this, but I do want to prepare anyone who wants to breastfeed. I definitely wasn’t fully prepared for how hard it was going to be. On top of the pain, it’s hard to get used to the schedule, dress for nursing, leave the house in time to do something before it’s time to feed again, and get the courage to nurse in public. But y’all, it is so worth it. The bonding time, the snuggles, knowing that I’m giving her the healthiest thing…it’s so worth it. If anyone ever needs any advice or encouragement, I’d love to help! Feel free to contact me! 
The biggest things I’ve learned: it’s okay if you don’t just LOVE it in the beginning. It’s a little awkward and takes some time to get the hang of it. Just because you have pain, doesn’t mean you are doing something wrong. My pain was severe and we had the perfect position and the perfect latch. My lactation consultant said sometimes you just have pain. Try not to pump too early. You don’t want to create an oversupply. Buy nursing bras!! You need them. And some tank tops to wear around the house. Easy access is nice. : ) It gets better with time. It becomes more natural and there’s no pain at all. You can do it!!
One thing I do want to add, though…is that everyone’s story is different and we should never ever judge a mom for whether she chooses to breastfeed or not. It’s hard enough being a mom without all of us judging each other! Plus, there’s no telling what problems she might have had with it. We are all doing the best that we can! 
*all pictures via Lindsey Caroon Photography

Thanks Megan for sharing your story! Make sure you catch up with the rest of the Breastfeeding Diaries at the top of my navigation bar.


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Comments

  1. Love this! Encouragement is SO KEY! We didn't get enough – and I think it would have been nice! Megan and Emory are so cute… And encouraging!

  2. Congratulations for sticking it out! We had a rough start too and I really think that's where a lot of moms get defeated and throw in towel. If the baby isn't getting nutrition, you got to do what's right and there is nothing wrong with formula, but sometimes perseverance will get you through!! And it's so rewarding when it does!

  4. If I hadn't prayed through every single feeding of his 8 day growth spurt at 2 weeks, there's no way I'd still be nursing my little man 4 months later. It's ROUGH! and encouragement is so key. I remember texting my best friend after every single time he ate for a few days, just because I needed to hear I was doing it right. I was nuts and she was so, so good to me! haha

  5. I can completely relate to your feelings at the beginning! I also dreaded feeding my son because it was so difficult to get him to latch (tears every time). It makes you feel like such a bad mom when you experience those feelings after reading how great breastfeeding should be.

    I made it to the one year mark, but I never would have without my friend's encouragement. I originally had a 6 month goal but at the two week mark that seemed impossible. The best advice I got was set SMALL goals for yourself. For a long time that goal was to breastfeed one more day and eventually the goal became to nurse until the next doctor's appointment.

    I wish this series had been around when I was going through my first few weeks with my son. It has to be so encouraging for new moms to hear so many different experiences and know their feelings are normal!

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