The Girl in the Red Shoes

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The Breastfeeding Diaries: Chelsea from Two Twenty One

Hi! I’m Chelsea from Two Twenty One, where I blog about a wonderful array of topics– DIY projects, home & holiday decor, organization, recipes, lifestyle, and more. I gave birth to our little guy, Owen, 12 weeks ago, and we’ve been breastfeeding from day one.
I chose to breastfeed for a multitude of reasons. The health benefits for Owen and me. The economic benefits– although breastfeeding isn’t completely free (nursing bras and tanks, nursing pads, breast milk storage bags, etc.), it is less expensive than formula. I also like the convenience aspect of breastfeeding. No time wasted preparing bottles. No need to carry bottles, formula, and bottled water in the diaper bag. Not having to constantly wash bottles. Another reason was because my mom breastfed my older brother and me. She is a strong proponent of breastfeeding and encouraged me to breastfeed.
Another reason that made me want to have a successful breastfeeding experience was because I wasn’t able to have the labor and delivery I wanted. Not having the birth I desired made me want to work hard at breastfeeding. I wanted to feel like something worked out the way I wanted it to.
o and me
I think it’s really important to have a supportive partner while trying to learn the breastfeeding ropes. I’m so thankful my husband was willing to do things like look up YouTube videos on latching or run to the grocery store at 10PM because I needed cabbage for my severely engorged breasts.
Since I’m taking an extended maternity leave from my day job, I’m able to exclusively breastfeed Owen 24/7. I’m his personal 7-Eleven. Owen typically wakes up around 8AM for his first feeding of the day after sleeping for 7-9 hours through the night, and then he goes back down for a 2-4 hour nap. He eats again after that nap, and then we usually start a feeding schedule of nursing every 2-3 hours for the remainder of the day.
I don’t pump often, but I have a freezer stash from when I was pumping more in the beginning. The freezer stash came in handy last week when I went on a 48 hour business trip. I was able to pump 5-6 times per day while I was away, so I ended up coming home with about 50 ounces of breast milk to replenish some of the supply Owen depleted while I was gone.
The most rewarding part of breastfeeding is knowing that I’m providing all of Owen’s nutrition. It’s a crazy feeling knowing that my body is the reason why he has his chubby thigh rolls. Another rewarding aspect of breastfeeding is the bonding time that we have together. We spend at least two hours of every day together nursing, and I love that one on one time I get to have with him.
o 1
The most surprising aspect of breastfeeding has been how easy things became after the first 4-5 weeks. It was like night and day when the nipple pain subsided. I won’t lie and say breastfeeding has been easy. The first few weeks were rough. Every time Owen latched on it felt like I was nursing a crocodile.
And then there’s my large and in charge milk cyst. When my milk came in and I experienced the party that is engorgement, the cyst filled up and it hasn’t gone away since. I had an ultrasound done when Owen was 3 weeks old. The radiologist didn’t know what it was filled with so they suggested that I have it aspirated with a syringe. So they shoved a giant needle into the side of my boob and aspirated 50 mL of breast milk. But the cyst filled back up with milk within 24 hours. I had a follow up ultrasound 5 weeks later. This time they spotted some questionable tissue inside the cyst so they suggested another aspiration and a core needle biopsy. They aspirated 45 mL of breast milk that time. When they did the biopsy it caused a hematoma inside the cyst so every time I expressed breast milk, for the next week, blood would also come out. While this wasn’t painful, it was slightly unsettling. Thankfully, the biopsy came back as benign. I’ve since seen a breast surgeon to talk about my options. We’re going to try to treat the cyst conservatively (massage and ice) since it’s not too terribly uncomfortable (I’d rate it a 2 out of 10). I just ask that people don’t hug me really tight. Hah. So needless to say, this whole milk cyst thing has been the biggest challenge.
I’d advise new moms who plan to breastfeed to sit down with a lactation consultant before going into labor. There’s so much is going on after you give birth that it’s hard to take everything in. So I’d suggest scheduling at least one visit with the LC at the hospital where you plan to give birth so you can ask her questions and she can give you information so you feel prepared when your baby arrives. I really wish I would have taken the time to do that.
o
I’m also telling all my expecting friends to get Dr. Jack Newman’s All Purpose Nipple Ointment before going into labor. Trust me, you’ll want it from the beginning. You can read more about my experience with this life changing ointment here.
Another piece of advice I would offer is to brush people off when they say breastfeeding is “so hard”. I heard that all the time when I was pregnant, and I have to admit, it got annoying. While it wasn’t discouraging to me, if anything it made me want to make it work even more, I could see how hearing that could discourage expectant mothers. Yes, breastfeeding isn’t a walk in the park for most people, but know that it’s very rewarding and worth all the hard work you put into it.
Thanks so much for having me, Julie! This is such a wonderful outlet for moms to share their breastfeeding experiences.

 Be sure to catch up with the rest of the Breastfeeding Diaries at the top of my navigation bar.



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The Breastfeeding Diaries: Chelsea from The Perfect Catch

 Hi!  I’m Chelsea from The Perfect Catch Blog, a lifestyle blog about my adventures being a wife, mom and shopaholic living in the suburbs of Houston, TX. I’m also a contributor for Houston Moms Blog.  My husband Jason and I met at the Houston Rodeo (how Texan is that) and have been married for almost five years. We have a nine month old sweet baby boy named Jack Grayson and a ten year old furbaby – a chihuahua named Tucker. 

 I can not thank Julie enough for hosting the Breastfeeding Diaries Series. As you will read below in my story, Julie’s blog and all of the guest posts greatly contributed to my breastfeeding success.  I’m incredibly excited to be apart of this series. 

The Decision


I never thought twice about my desire to breastfeed. It was a given that I would in my mind. I knew that there might be issues beyond my control, but as long as I was able to, this was my plan.  This is where my planning stopped. Let me back up and tell you how much of a planner I am. I research everything and over think anything. Throughout my pregnancy I read all of the preparing for baby books, browsed baby stores like it was my job and polled all of my friends with kids. My husband and I toured the hospital where we would deliver, never missed a doctors appointment and took lots of classes: infant care, childbirth, infant CPR. We even had our infant seats professionally installed. 
 In all of this planning I did not do one thing to prepare for breastfeeding except buy a breast pump which I threw in the back of my closet. I knew nothing about breastfeeding aside from all of the benefits it offers you and your baby. I thought letdown was a feeling of disappointment…so much to learn! 

The Delivery

Jack was induced exactly one week early due to my increased blood pressure and sudden weight gain. After only a few hours of minor contractions I was sent to the operating room for a cesarean. Jack was not responding well to the contractions and having late decelerations. I was beyond disappointed to deliver via c-section, but as soon as Jack was born our perfect birth plan was long forgotten. You can read our full birth story here.


I was able to see Jack for just a few minutes before he was taken to the nursery to stabilize and have tests performed with our pediatrician. I wasn’t able to hold my baby again until three hours later so we never had that initial skin to skin moment or breastfeeding right away like I wanted. With all of the complications and the quickness of the delivery, I was scared and just did whatever the doctors and nurses told me to do. Finally after five hours or so I asked if I could breastfeed. Someone in my room piped in and said, you don’t have to ask, it’s your baby. So FINALLY, we tried to breastfeed. I had a lactation consultant and my husband by my side and everything went perfect. Good latch. Happy baby. We were in business. 



The Struggles


I nursed Jack every few hours or anytime he seemed hungry. The hospital staff was there when I needed them. I was experiencing some major pain during feedings and even though the lactation consultants told me that nursing shouldn’t hurt, his latch and my technique seemed good so we just kept at it and I struggled through the pain. Who knew that I wouldn’t ever get to use those breathing techniques that we practiced in childbirth class for labor, but for breastfeeding!


 One frustrating thing we did experience at the hospital was all of the different answers we were given. Some nurses told me to nurse Jack as long as he wanted it. Others said to stop after 30 minutes. Since I did not do any breastfeeding education on my own I was at their mercy about what to do. I started feeling defeated and cried a lot during our nursing sessions. 


Jack lost some weight by the time we were released from the hospital, but we were told this was normal and to just continue doing what we were doing. Home we went where I continued the painful nursing sessions. After just a few days at home, Jack starting spitting up blood so I immediately called our pediatrician…on her cell phone…in the middle of the night (yes, I was that mom). It was determined that it was just blood from my cracked and sore nipple and to give that side a rest for a few days. I healed with time (and lots of lanolin cream). 


 Those first few weeks were the hardest. I was trying to get our groove with nursing, educate myself since I hadn’t prepared ahead of time and get a little rest too. Ha! Try reading a book about breastfeeding with a crying newborn and a few hours of sleep. I had a lot of self doubt, but a strong desire to stick with it even when others told me it was okay to throw in the towel. 
I was an emotional mess at times. I wish someone would have prepared me more for the baby blues. I would cry at the drop of a hat and then feel guilty because I was crying which led to more crying. What a sight! Pictured below is me with Jack just ten days old on my 30th birthday. All within the first two weeks of Jack’s life we celebrated my first mother’s day, birthday and our wedding anniversary. I can remember just wishing these celebrations away because I just couldn’t handle it all. The purpose of me sharing this with you is just to reassure any new mom with these same feelings that it will quickly get easier even when you can’t imagine that it will. I always find comfort knowing that other moms have gone through the same thing.


 Mistakes were made along the way, but we all learned as we struggled along. One of those mistakes was using the breast pump too early. My husband felt helpless and wanted to assist with feedings so I could rest so he urged me to pump milk. After just a day of being home from the hospital I started pumping. All this did for us was put added pressure on me. Another thing on the to-do list rather than just be with my baby – pump, wash the parts, worry about ounces. Plus this never really gave my body a time to rest in between all of the constant newborn feedings. Finally, my OB saw that I was struggling (there may have been a few tears at a checkup) and stepped in to tell me to put the pump away and relax. “But what about building a freezer supply before I go back to work” I asked him with a quivering lip. He told me again to relax, focus on the baby, and listen to my instincts. Best advice ever. He was right. I didn’t worry about building a freezer supply until two weeks before I went back to work and I had plenty!
Another decision that I made after the first month was to introduce a little formula into our feeding schedule. I realize that some breastfeeding advocates are gasping right now (grab a paper bag), but this was the best decision for me at the time. Sometimes I did need a break as Jack always seemed hungry. I felt like I wasn’t providing him with enough, but also wasn’t ready to throw in the towel. From about week 4 to week 9 we gave Jack about one feeding per day of formula, sometimes none. It never upset his stomach and gave me a little break. Plus, Jack seemed more content after we added this. Happy mom, happy baby. After week 9, I was able to get on a pumping schedule that worked for me and build that freezer supply I was so worried about. We haven’t used formula since (and I’ve never really needed that freezer supply).   
During this crazy time I was doing a lot of googling and stumbled upon The Breastfeeding Diaries.  I remember sitting in bed while Jack napped and reading each and every post. Each story, even though all different, made me feel better. It’s like a light bulb went off and I realized that everything I was experiencing was completely normal. Breastfeeding can be difficult, but oh so rewarding.  It just takes some time. It helped to know that I wasn’t alone in my struggles as I often felt those first few weeks.
The Payoff
I’m so happy that I stuck through the hard times. After just two months I actually started enjoying nursing and looked forward to his feedings. It was our special time to bond and something only I could provide for him.  It is the most rewarding feeling to know that your body is what is keeping your baby nourished. 
At 2.5 months, I went back to my full-time job leaving Jack with a nanny. This was a much easier transition than I had anticipated (not easy, just not as bad as I had imagined). I was very worried about losing my supply when I returned to work or him refusing to nurse after becoming accustomed to a bottle. We’ve hit bumps in the road every now and then (and several nursing strikes), but at 9 months we are still going strong! 


 I’m able to nurse Jack before I leave for work in the morning. He gets two bottles of expressed milk while I’m away. Luckily I only have to pump 1-2 times per day: once during the day while I’m at work and a second time before I go to bed most nights (other nights I’m way too tired and give myself a break). These 1-2 pumping sessions give me enough milk for his bottles the next day. I’m able to nurse him late afternoon as soon as I get home and one more time before he goes to bed.  My most favorite part of the day is our nursing session as soon as I get home from work.  My husband isn’t home yet and it’s not quite time to worry about dinner.  It’s just our special, quiet time to reconnect.   


  
The Advice
I made a lot of mistakes along the way. My biggest piece of advice for moms-to-be is to educate yourselves ahead of time. Knowledge is power and will give you confidence. Take a class, read books, and identify help in your area before you need it. Buy the supplies you think you might need like a breast pump, but also take the time in advance to learn how to use it properly. Trying to read a breast pump manual with a screaming newborn just isn’t the most ideal. Read more about my breast feeding book and product recommendations here. 
Second, trust your instincts. Since I didn’t have confidence with my lack of breastfeeding preparedness I listened to others more than I should have. At the end of the day, I somehow knew what was best for my baby and should have listened to myself more. 
Set small goals for yourself, but also don’t be afraid to adjust them. My ultimate goal before I gave birth was to breastfeed for at least 6 months. I don’t really know how I came up with that number. It seemed attainable and in line with what my friends had done. After those first few weeks of struggling, I adjusted that goal to 6 weeks. Just make it 6 weeks Chelsea. Very attainable and I did it! Once I hit the 6 week mark things were better so I readjusted that goal to 3 months. By 3 months I was not only still breastfeeding, but not supplementing with formula anymore and LOVING our nursing sessions. I then hit my next milestone of 6 months so we kept at it. Happy Dance! My ultimate goal is one year, but no matter how long I make it, I feel proud of myself and my baby.  Don’t forget to celebrate your successes too. I like to celebrate with dessert. 


Finally, don’t be so hard on yourself. Push everything off your plate those first few weeks at home other than you and your baby. I should have worried less and cuddled more. Even now I know I’m too hard on myself to be that perfect “super mom” who can maintain a career, blog, healthy baby, happy husband and even throw in a Pinterest project or two. It’s exhausting and impossible so we all need to throw that notion of super mom out the window!  


 Thank you so much for reading my story.  I hope you were able to find something helpful in it, even if it’s just, wow people in Texas really do go to rodeos. I think any mom who is trying to be the best for her family is simply amazing. I love this online community that has been created so that we are able to support and encourage each other. Be sure and check out my tips for nursing and pumping on the go too.  Hope to catch you soon. 
All professional photos by Studio Ainsley

Be sure to catch up with the rest of the Breastfeeding Diaries at the top of my navigation bar!


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  2. GREAT post! I agree that somehow we just don't educate ourselves about breastfeeding during pregnancy. We also don't truly educate ourselves about birth in general. And I agree 100% with the hospital staff giving you contradictory information about nursing. I had the exact same issue!

  3. Beautiful story! I struggled as well in the early weeks of nursing – and I had taken a course in breastfeeding! My son ended up having a posterior tongue tie. I think it's so important that we share each our stories in order to normalize the difficulty that can sometimes occur with breastfeeding and not to give up!!

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The Breastfeeding Diaries: Chelsea from Red Velvet Rooster

I am so honored to be a part of this wonderful series known as the Breastfeeding Diaries.  I think it is so wonderful for mothers to be able to share their successes and challenges with other mothers.  It is a great resource and I am proud to be a part of it.  I am the mother of a 2 year-old son named Jack, aka Bubba.  He is a stubborn, gentle-hearted, rough and tumble, All-American boy.  He loves superheroes like Spider-Man and Super-Man, Tractors and the outdoors.  He is a Mama’s boy, but no one holds a candle to his Daddy!  I no longer breastfeed my son and haven’t since he was about a month old.  There is a story behind us…

There was never any question in my mind as to whether or not I was going to breastfeed.  Most, if not all, of the women in my family breastfed their babies. I knew I was going to breastfeed.  I assumed that all would fall into place on its own.  I mean, our bodies are made for breastfeeding, right?  I never thought it would be challenging.  The women in my family made it look effortless.  Looking back on things, I wish I would have taken a breastfeeding class before giving birth.  If anything, to have a group of women in similar stages as me for a support system.  I was the only one of my friends having a baby and I lived hours away from my family, so I did not have many people to lean on and ask for help when it came to breastfeeding.




I loved everything about Jack’s birth.  I was induced and had a 14 hour labor.  It was all pretty textbook outside of the sheer intensity of everything thanks to the Pitocin to induce labor.  The only things I wish I had done differently was breastfeed as soon as possible after he was born.  Before family came in to meet him, before his first bath, before anything. I really wished I had been more focused on breastfeeding in those first couple of hours, but I was so totally exhausted!  I also bled a lot following Jack’s birth and it took the Doctor a while to get it under control.  The blood loss definitely took a toll on me in those first few hours.  Basically, everything was a blur after giving birth.  I also wish I had asked for more support from lactation specialists and even made an appointment with one before just giving up on breastfeeding.  I feel like if I had had more guidance in the beginning I might not have had as hard of a time with breastfeeding.


 


What surprised me the most was how challenging breastfeeding was and how much your production can be hindered by stress and anxiety!  Bubba had to be put under the bili-lights for 24 hours at the hospital a day after we took him home.  His jaundice was slightly more serious than normal because he was Direct-Coombs positive due to ABO incompatability, which happens most commonly to Blood Type O Moms like me who give birth to children with Blood Type A, B or AB. Basically, my Hubby and I have incompatible blood types.  The result is HIGH bilirubin levels most of the time.  It is still easily taken care of with the bili-lights, but it can be dangerous if not treated quickly. 

We were lucky enough to be able to have a room with Jack while he laid under the bili-lights, but I had a meltdown during this time and I let stress and anxiety consume me.  I even had to leave the room when they gave Jack an IV because I was just so fragile.  My Hubby had to bear the brunt of things while we were in the hospital. Looking back, my reaction was ridiculous and dramatic, but hormones do funny things to us Mommies.  Once my emotions had leveled, I actually enjoyed our stay in the hospital.  Bubba loved being under the warm lights, Hubby and I snuggled in the bed most of the day, I fed Jack every 2.5 hours.  It was also comforting to have nurses and doctors nearby because I was still so afraid of breaking my precious child.  All went well with the bili-lights, so we got to go home the next day and I continued to breastfeed for the next month.  

I loved breastfeeding and the bond it created between my son and me.  I loved my world revolving around Bubba’s.  I loved snuggling up in the recliner with the Boppy and Bubba.  I would watch Mad Men on Netflix while he ate.  I loved feeling like I could provide for him, literally, everything he needed. Or so I thought…

A week or so after he had been in the hospital for jaundice, I began to notice that nothing seemed to make him happy.  He never fell asleep after nursing and instead continued to cry.  He would nurse for 45 minutes at a time and still was not be satisfied.  He gave me blisters from nursing so hard. He was super gassy and was only sleeping, at the most, 8 hours a day!  I also began to notice that he didn’t seem to be gaining weight and my breasts were not nearly as full as they were before we took Bubba to hospital for his jaundice.  I just assumed my concerns meant I was an anal-attentive mother and that he was fine so I tried to ignore signs for another week or so.  

Things were not getting better and I knew all of this was not normal, so Hubs and I decided I should pump one day and see how much milk I would get.  I had not pumped yet as I was planning on stockpiling my milk about a month before I went back to work.  I got 1 ounce in 30 minutes of pumping.  I remember staying on the pump for an entire hour out of sheer desperation trying to get every last drop out.  It was then I realized that he had not been getting enough to eat from me.  We went to the doctor to confirm our suspicions. He had dropped almost a pound from his birth weight in a month.  That same day I rushed to the store and purchased a bunch of Similac Sensitive.  Watching him drink that first bottle of formula was the most amazing moment for me.  For the first time in Bubba’s life, he was satisfied.  He fell asleep right after that first bottle.  Everything fell into place fast after we switched to formula.  

I cried a lot about the fact that he was so hungry for a month and that I could not provide nourishment for him.  I cannot look at pictures of him from that first month without crying.  He looked like a tiny, old man.  To this day, I still cannot believe that it took me so long to acknowledge there was a problem…It was as if my determination to breastfeed my son had blinded me.  I had just assumed that everything would work out.  It never occurred to me that sometimes women can’t breastfeed.   
I cried a lot about the fact that I could not breastfeed as I was planning on breastfeeding him for the first year.  I felt so guilty about my underproduction that once we started giving him formula I just gave up breastfeeding altogether, when I should have tried to give him what little I had to offer for the sake of his immunity and for the sake of us continuing that bond that can only happen during breastfeeding.  I was comforted by the fact that Bubba loved his formula so much and by how he began to thrive and grow into the huge 2 year-old boy he is today.  If we decide to have a second child, I hope I will have more success breastfeeding now that I know what to expect and now that I know more about products like Fenugreek bars, teas, etc.   

My advice to new mothers or breastfeeding mothers in general is to quit putting so much pressure on yourself! It can, literally, ruin your milk supply and ruin YOU.  If you have your heart set on breastfeeding, but you end up not producing enough, don’t get your feelings hurt if your have to supplement.  Do not convince yourself that you have failed and do not listen to anyone who tells you that!  Supplement as much as is needed, but keep trying to breastfeed too!  What little they get out will be beneficial for them and you can still experience the bond that is created through breastfeeding.  



It is a blessing that our children don’t remember being babies…because their parents would never be able to live down the number of times they screwed up trying to do right by them.  Hey, you have to have a sense of humor when you become a parent!  GOOD LUCK TO ALL!

Special thanks again to Julie for letting me be a part of this special series!




Chelsea Signature


Chelsea can be found at Red Velvet Rooster

Be sure to catch up with the rest of the Breastfeeding Diaries series at the top of my navigation bar!


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  1. Chelsea, thank you for sharing your story with us today! Your son is absolutely precious. I think it's amazing that you tried so hard to breastfeed, but were flexible enough to do do what you had to do to provide for your son. Hoping that next time around breastfeeding goes a little better for you, as I can imagine how disappointing that was! No matter what, as long as the baby is happy, you are doing your job as a Mommy. And are a great Mommy for that!:)

  2. Thank you for sharing!! I am breastfeeding my 8 month old right now, but, I, too, wish I would have attended a breastfeeding class. When Aiden was born, he didn't pee for a couple days and we took him to the pediatrician and realized that he was dehydrated and that I had to give him formula too for a day. I went to a lactation consultant and breastfeeding support group and that saved me from quitting. It's definitely challenging in the beginning!

  3. I love this series and hearing mom's stories, but I do want to make sure mamas know that the amount you pump is NOT how much your baby gets. Babies are much more effective at removing milk from the breast, and the quality of pumps varies wildly, plus there are hormones present during nursing that aren't there when you're snuggling a plastic pump. I hate hearing that myth perpetuated, as it often leads to unnecessary supplementation and supplementation leads to decreased supply! Just a public service announcement for others.

    -Meg

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