Hi everyone, I am Charity and I blog at Our Pemberley. I am married to an amazing man, Jose. I became a mom in May of 2014 to our handsome son, Theodore. I knew right away when we found out that we were expecting I wanted to breast feed. So, I set out to read all I could about being successful. By the time our son arrived I could have probably taught a class on the subject I had read so much.
In the hospital the nursery nurse got him to latch right away, and I remember thinking thank the Lord this is going to work. Overnight I kept feeding him, but it was excruciating each time he latched. The next day we were visited by the lactation consultant who by this time could tell I was in a lot of pain with each feeding. She worked with us for the better part of an hour and brought in a nipple shield to help with the pain of latching. I was still not going to let this set back deter me from successfully beast feeding.
Fast forward a week to Teddy’s first checkup and we realized he was still not back to birth weight. The doctor mentioned supplementation at this appointment, but I wanted to try everything before we went that route. I went to a few la leche league meetings and sought the help of the lactation consultant I had seen in the hospital. They all said I was doing great and that Teddy was eating fine.
When we returned to the doctor for his two week checkup he had only gained an ounce. Talk about disheartened, I was in tears when the doctor said we should supplement. When my husband gave Teddy that first bottle I had to leave the room because I felt like such a failure.
Slowly Teddy started gaining weight with the supplementation. I, however, started to realize that I had supply issues. I would pump for half an hour and only get a half an ounce. Also, if Teddy went longer without feeding I never experienced the engorgement that so many people talk about. Eventually we made the decision to stop breast feeding all together at six weeks. I was heartbroken, but it really was for the best. My son and I were finally able to enjoy one another instead of dreading mealtimes. I was finally able to get some much needed rest as well. It is amazing how the world looks so different when you sleep.
Now at fourteen months we have a happy, healthy, and very intelligent toddler. If I could offer one piece if advice it would be to not be disappointed if breast feeding doesn’t work for you and your little one. The most important thing is that you are doing what is best for you and baby. At the end of the day your are still mom and you will still have a close connection with your little one.
I have been asked if I would try it again with a second child and to that I most emphatically say yes! I do not believe that just because it didn’t work this time that it will never work. I will, however, have a much more flexible goal and know that no matter what happens I will always do what is best for my baby.
Thanks to Julie for the opportunity to guest post and I hope y’all enjoyed our story!
Be sure to catch up with the rest of the Breastfeeding Diaries at the top of my navigation bar.
Great post! I love reading all the breastfeeding stories! I referred back to them lots during my own time nursing my sweet boy! xo
Charity Gonzalez says
Thanks for sharing! Your story sounds so much like mine with my son. He wasn't gaining weight (even when I was feeding him every 1-2 hours) and I was pumping around the clock and barely getting anything. I would cry after girls' nights with my friends when they would all talk about nursing successfully. He loved his bottle though, and is a very healthy and smart 4 year old. I now have a 7 week old baby girl. Nursing hasn't gone perfectly, but it's going SO much better. I still have to supplement, but we both enjoy nursing and she is growing and healthy. I feel really at peace with things this time around.
Charity Gonzalez says
Thanks for sharing that Elizabeth! I am hoping that next time around it will go so much smoother or at least I will not stress about it as much. I am glad you enjoyed our story.