Be sure to tear through every room, closet, cabinet, and drawer in your house…twice. Also, and this is very important, remember to sob uncontrollably. It also helps if you call/sob the missing cat’s name all around your back yard…and your neighbor’s back yard while searching every bush and tree with a flashlight. During this time remind yourself to thank your husband for searching the neighbor’s yard and surrounding wooded areas for your cat…at 11 o’clock at night. Also remember to thank him for driving around the neighborhood in search of said cat. Be sure to revert to being a 5 year old and call your mom and freak her out by sobbing into the phone. Oh, and make sure your other cat helps you search for him. Whatever you do, do not try to make him sniff out the trail of the lost cat…this will not work because he will be too busy exploring the back yard you never let him play in…and also because he is not a hound dog. Furthermore, do not leave him on the deck while you and your husband search the neighborhood…he will wake up everyone on the block with his loud cries.
And finally, listen to your mother when she says that you will find him, even though you have been looking for your lost cat for an hour and it is 11:30 at night….because you will. You will find him in your neighbor’s yard (where your husband has already looked twice, of course). You will see a pair of eyes glowing at you when you shine him with your flashlight. He will hiss at you and run on to the neighbor’s deck. Do not be discouraged! Put down your flashlight, hold out your hand and when he realizes it is you, he will come to you. Jump for joy, hug and kiss him like a crazy cat-lady, and call your husband who is still out searching the neighborhood and exclaim that he has been found!
Oh, and the next morning, when you are still red-eyed, tired, and look like you have a hangover, remember how much you love your silly, sneaky, cat, and vow to never ever let him out on the deck by himself again. The end.
In case you were wondering, that was our night last night…and the missing cat in question was our dear Henry.